Cursive
by johndoe061
Summary: A Girl has an abusive boyfriend and dreading what her parents will think if they find out, she runs away from home to find her own life and finds out that life is not always what you think it to be.


Chapter 1: Bruises

I have him. I finally have him. The one guy I had fantasized about having on my arm since my freshman year in high school. This excited my feelings toward him until they were hovering on intense and entering on the realm of supernatural. It was hard to believe that I could feel this much emotion coming from one man. Was that healthy? I do realize after all that too much emotion can make you look ragged and gain wrinkles much too early for my age, which by the way is approximately nineteen years old and going on twenty. I can not believe I have him. I danced merrily around the cramped space my parents call a room. It is only eight feet by ten feet. I can't believe they got me the absolute smallest size possible. I really don't think they care about me. Did my parents really think I would be able to fit up here when I was nineteen like now for example?

The topic stretched on in my head for what seemed like hours. I looked at the clock in my room. It was only four o'clock and my date wouldn't be here for another couple of hours. Then, it hit me; I had not yet picked out what I would wear. I had a boundless selection of clothing it seemed to me, and I had no possible solution to how all of that could have fit in my closet. I guess there is one pro to having the smallest room in the house. It wasn't small at all. My parents just wanted to give me more closet space since they had figured I would be a girl. I couldn't concentrate. The thought of him showing up at my door in two hours time had me schizophrenic with anticipation, and for God's sake I thought trying to get a grip of myself. Why was I thinking about his quivering member when he saw me? Why was I thinking about his crotch? That's just wrong! I shook my head violently to get the said vision out of that perverted and contorted mind of mine.

He had finally arrived right on time. I had decided to wear a pale blue dress with a lavender hand-bag. It was not the best match but it would have to do. My dad yelled for the football team to score. The only reason I say "The" is because by now I've lost track of the team he roots for, and personally I think it would be just stupid of me to ask him. I yelled to dad "We're leaving now."

"Alright" he yelled back.

"Have a good time."

My date and I, whose name is Dan by the way, ventured along the drive as slowly as we could. We gradually picked up speed. I opened the car door. The car was electric blue and had a convertible top. I slid into the passenger seat. The leather interior was pleasing to the eye. Dan slowly backed us out of the drive, and then started a conversation. "How has school been going for you this year?" That was the best he could do? Really? Dan? To carry along our conversation, so I wouldn't hurt his feelings I said "Fine I've just been doing kind of I don't know C work in Spanish"

"Oh," he said.

"Me too"

As we drew closer to the school we parked the car with the utmost care. I wondered why he did this so precisely. The car was probably his Dad's or something. We both got out; Dan slammed his door, I slammed mine, and he locked the car up. Then, I asked "Did we already pass the school?"

Then Dan said "Yes"

"Why did you pass the school?" "That is where the dance is"

"I know" he said

"Then what are we doing here?" I asked.

"You'll see" he said.

"May I have a hug? Do you forgive me?" he asked in quick succession.

"You may" I said.

I soon learned that this action was a mistake on my part. He hugged me. Then, what happened next was scaring. He groped around in his pockets for a while, as I tried to pull away. Then he took out a tiny package. It was about the size of a complementary soap bar at a resort. I wonder what he would do with that with me here.

"Are you ready?" he asked with an eerie flicker of a smile.

Then I said "No!' in the loudest voice I could muster at this point which wasn't very loud in the grand spectrum of things.

"Help" I yelled.

"Help"

No one responded.

"Do you know why I brought you out here?" he said with that eerie smile flickering across his face once again.

"Why?" I asked rounding on him.

"To do this" he said in a whisper barely audible over the whistling wine of the wind blowing in our ears now.

He kissed my face with the most tender touch I had ever felt well, ever. It made me feel so alive. Although, there were consequences; it seemed as if sex was his only priority and I pushed him away.

"I know you want to do this" I said

"It could be dangerous to you and your health, and me and mine"

"You should really consider-"

"I know I have to consider my consequences to you and to the possibility of a baby"

"You're right and another thing, I barely know you"

"We've only dated for two months from the seventeenth of October."

"And your point is?" he asked with a questionable face.

"Are you even remotely intelligent?" I spat with the most ease I could have mustered while nervous about what he would do to me.

"Which is what?" he asked.

Was he getting stupider by the second? For a while I had substantial evidence of that until he responded.

"No."

"Alright then, why are we here then?" I asked him.

"No reason, I would have thought you would want to spend quality time with me, but I can see I was wrong" he let out a short innocent whimper after his sudden exclamation.

"I want to spend time with you" I said in a quiet voice.

"You do?" he said.

"Yes I was just being my semi-normal paranoid self.

"Alright" he said. "Now that that is straightened out"

We sat inside the car for what seemed like hours, to watch the flakes that started falling outside. A winter romance I thought. I would even be jealous of myself if I weren't myself at this very moment. I also wondered inside my head if Dan thought that this was not a time to wait for… what my parents called "it" or if he thought it was alright to wait. As long as he had no intentions of prying into the emotions etched to my face at this moment as I thought, I would be fine.

Dan and I finished the date with a nice slow car ride home. We both had been exhausted by the amount of talking done by each of us. Though Dan may have thought it was a nice ride home, dropping me off, and scheduling a second date. I can't believe I actually said yes to him. He had the mysterious small, white package associated, though my parents called "it" it they had just found a new member of the "it" club, me. I was both extremely aroused by his interpretation and want of "it", but I couldn't help feeling awkward. I would have to carry his baby if for some reason the item in the white package was not of sufficient quality. I shuddered at the thought of that and let out a small scream. When I proceeded up to my room my parents followed and seemed alarmed. The only way I could tell was by the expression on my mother's face.

There I stood and the task force in my head was working over time to comprehend the possibility of a second date with Dan. My parents gawked at my face and I stood and looked in a mirror positioned on the wall next to the door. Bruises littered my face like randomly placed pink roses. Now I see why my parents gawked; it was because the bruises shown bright as day upon the face I wish I never had. It was so unexpected. I had no recollection of the bruises being imprinted on my face. My perfect face was ruined. I slept in anguish that night thinking of the bruises on my face, awaking in the middle of the night. Dan was there, shirtless. It seemed so right to me just then. He withdrew the small white package from the back pocket of his pants. In the dark, it seemed eerily sexy although, I asked him to stop before he semi-groped me. Dan got a hardy slap across the face. As my hand tingled; I laid back down on my bed and watched for Dan to come to.

Why was I watching? I should be running and fast at that. I reached deep inside myself and my fear had gripped my entire body. I sat quivering on the bed in what seemed like semidarkness. I ran. I kept quiet at the same time as I couldn't let my parents find out about my disaster of a boyfriend, Dan. I they found out I would be banned from dating and I have to get the tutorial for twelve year olds from my parents a second time and I cringed at the thought. There was a more dominant reason in mind, Dan coming to from a loud noise and kicking my ass, or entire body judging from how I felt at the moment. If I'd known that Dan was this way I would never have gotten into this mess I called, for lack of a better word, a relationship. I called it this because the word never specifies which kind of relationship a prosperous one or a satanic one.

The first step was to find a place to stay. I had no idea how to approach this problem because I'd always had a place to stay since well, forever. With nowhere to go I wandered the streets with nothing in my possession but a pen, and one piece of paper on which I've been writing this, my story to tell the world. I felt as if I was an outcast. Everyone averted their eyes as if pretending not to see me. I am here in New York City, on a street corner dancing for change, thrown at me by strangers. I would love to be home right now, but I have a duty to myself for my parents to never figure out that this happened to me and that I am living this way. I doubt I can live much longer like this or any way other than the life I have abandoned. I couldn't afford to converse with the city's people passing in trains, cars, and trucks, and even on bikes and Segways. I, for the first time in my life felt poor.

I camped out under a tree planted at the top of a hotel called, The Empire and slept next to the light on situated above the door.


End file.
